There Are Two Ways to Skin a Cat

Did I Mention I Like to Go Boating?

It was just a matter of time before I became a boating fool. Now that the weather is finally cooling off, I am able to enjoy spending time out on the water with the folks. My little fur coat doesn't make boating in the summer much fun, but now that it is beginning to feel like fall, I just grab my cooler (filled with ice water) something to chew on and away I go. I can hardly wait until my friend Marion gets back to Key West and show her all the cool places to go!

I Got a Job

I have a job now. For a couple of days each week, I get to go to work with the folks. I like to supervise my dad with his important business meetings and calls from my position lying down and napping on the cool tile in his office. I am in management, you know. Sometimes, while I make the rounds to make sure everyone is actually working or to get my head scratched, I stop into the Monica's office. She's the Marketing Coordinator and works with my mom. Monica has really great stuff on her floor that I like to carry around and show people.

Today Monica showed me how to use the computer. However, since my grownup teeth and my baby teeth are all sharing the same space in my mouth, all I want to do is bite things...like Monica's hand.

I've Got a Cat

I have a cat. She came with my new family. Her name is Callie and she is a calico. She was first my friend Reggie's cat, but he really didn't like her, so when Reggie moved to his really cool new house, Reggie's mom asked my mom if she wanted Callie. My mom loves cats and really liked Callie so when Reggie moved, Callie moved to Frances Street where she became Henry the Golden Retriever's cat. Henry and Callie adored each other. Then Henry got sick and died. Callie still had another Golden Retriever, Orion. However unless Callie curled up and pretended to be a tennis ball and rolled herself down the hallway, Orion couldn't be bothered with her.

Callie has been watching me since I got here. She comes down on the steps and taunts me. She thinks I don't know this but I am after all, a Golden Retriever. We met once briefly when I first moved in. I jumped on top of her and then she ran to the third floor and hid under a chair. She's been there since May. Because I am a big boy now and housebroken, I am allowed to go upstairs. Callie has been waiting for me. I love to jump on her and attack her. She's a pretty good sport. She takes it. She's only hissed at me a couple of times. I take this as sign of her affection towards me.

Hawkeye Takes the Plunge

I always knew I had it in me to be a great water dog. I fell in the pool the first day so the parents knew I noticed it was there. I swam when they took me to the beach. I let them drag me in the pool so I could swim around and show them that my large feet were not just for growing into. I wanted to ease into the swimming thing. I didn't want to get them too excited too early. I'm going to be around for quite a while and wanted to leave a few tricks up my sleeve...until I discovered I didn't have sleeves. Anyway, I couldn't hold out any longer. That cool blue water was just to tempting, so as they say, I took the plunge!

At Long Last....A Visit From the Tooth Fairy

There are a lot of special occasions in a dog owner's life. Bringing home that new bundle of fur, saying "Sit!" and actually getting what you asked for, seeing the puppy go to the door and ask to be let out and learning his name. However, I must confess, for me, the day I have been looking forward to the most since Hawkeye came home, was when his puppy teeth would start to fall out.

Golden Retrievers, like most bird dogs, are well known to have soft mouths. It's what makes them great sporting dogs and wonderful family pets. Regrettably this does not hold true for Golden Retriever puppies. It's bad enough that Fang (as he is affectionately known to my arms) has a mouth full of sharp razor-edged teeth. Add to that as a retriever, they are more mouthy than most breeds because they are after all, retrievers.

We have a wonderful vet, Dr. Ronit Berdugo, who comes to the house. She was here two weeks ago to give Hawkeye his final set of shots and mentioned that, "His teeth should start falling out anytime." Hallelujah! Music to my ears.

So began my tooth watch. Every chance I got, I checked those teeth, which wasn't easy since so much of the time they were attached to my forearm, my shirt, the hem of my shorts, my toes or my hand. For fourteen days I have been hoping and praying that today would be the day those razors would start to disappear and the large rounded version would be popping up in his "soft mouth." To quote Key West treasure hunter Mel Fisher, "Today's the day!" We lost our first tooth!

HOT DIGGITY DOG REVISITED (FROM FEBRUARY 3) – WHOSE HOUSE IS THIS ANYWAY?

(Hawkeye's note: My dad wrote this. He is a columnist for the Key West Citizen)

Well, we finally did it! We got a dog! Not just a dog like old Blue who’s been around a while and just lies there … a puppy! When you get a puppy, and I speak from great experience here, your whole life changes. When you see them comfortably nestled at the breast of their mother as a little ball of fur, you think, “Awwww, he’s so cute!” In reality, I’m not sure whether they are born Zen masters or the devil incarnate.

In any event, your life and everything that went before bringing the puppy home changes much the same way it does when you bring home your first child from the hospital. The major difference is, of course, that a puppy has been endowed by its creator, who must surely have a great sense of humor, with teeth as sharp as needles, a manic energy level on the order of a burlap bag full of alley cats and a curiosity to match.

One day you find yourself coming home from a day at the office, pouring a nice glass of red wine and sitting down comfortably to enjoy the evening air and a calm discussion of the day’s events. The next day, this changes to coming home to an immediate need of putting aside your own comfort and taking the little monster for a walk, feeding him and then making sure he is played with sufficiently so he doesn’t chew the leg off your dining room table. The rest of your evening is spent with one nervous eye on preparations for your own dinner and the other making sure your new tennis shoes don’t get chewed into a pair of sandals, or watching that the rug from the foyer isn’t dragged into some surreptitious corner of the house and ripped to shreds, or if he is leaving you a love present on the living room rug.

You can always tell someone who has a new puppy from the healing bite and cut marks from the elbows down. In the first several months of owning a puppy, never wear anything you don’t want to eventually use as a rag for washing the car because it will surely go that way with the slightest bit of inattention to the newfound joy of your puppy who will leap and snag a tooth on pants, shirts and dresses. If you have grandchildren (as I do), they should be seen in alternate, undisclosed places other than your house, otherwise they will be emotionally scarred for life as they are just the right height and temperament for a puppy to terrorize.

Of course the object in this masochistic exercise is to get a well-mannered companion who ultimately delivers on the intended promise of the relationship. While I am sure at some point (well, maybe cautiously optimistic) this will eventually happen, at the present time there is very little that the little beast will do without the bribe of a cookie. “Sit, down, stay, come,” and the like are interpreted by Hawkeye, the name of the dog in question, as “Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I have a cookie for you.” Somehow, though, the message gets through and he is starting to do some of these things, even though he thinks his name is “No!”.

If there was ever a quid pro quo relationship, this has to be it. We think we are teaching the dog to do things when actually, he is reminding us of the greatest lessons in life. You don’t teach anybody anything good or lasting by yelling at them or beating them into submission. You get out of your endeavors what you put into them. Patience is a lot more difficult than it’s cracked up to be and is a lesson in itself. You learn that puppies and young children are remarkably similar in that they want to know what the boundaries are. When they are not established, the result is an unhappy youth and an even unhappier parent. You learn, in no uncertain terms, that unconditional love is one of the greatest miracles of life. Dogs, more than any other animal on the planet (that I know of), do not hold grudges, seek revenge or do things out of spite. They forgive instantaneously and always give you another chance.

Finally, you can always pretty much tell a dog’s personality from the moment you first meet them. Their lack of guile and abundant desire to please, usually causes the extreme end of their body to go frantically back and forth. When you see this and they approach you, you know he is glad to see you and, if you’re smart, you will return the affection. Like Mark Twain said, “Men and dogs are different. When you take a dog in and feed him, he will not bite you.”

In any event, the lessons being learned by both animal and parents are not what they seem. All you have to do is remind yourself of who is picking up whose poop.

Making New Friends

I had the good fortune last week of being invited to a puppy party, but I was the only puppy. I did make my very first dog friends, Reggie, a cocker spaniel and Mamie a golden retriever. I really like them both a lot. Reggie showed me around his yard and wrestled with me, which I really liked. We are about the same size....for now. Mamie on the other hand is water maniac, which is what I think my folks want me to be. I just wanted to follow her around in the water, but she swims faster, dives in the water, retrieves...she was amazing. Of course, to her I was just a little peon, but I think one day I am going to surprise her.

Identity Crises

This past Friday, I went with my parents to work. At the beginning of each month, the entire office meets to wish folks happy birthday and anniversary. It's a nice touch and would be nicer if it had been held inside since I was the only one there in a fur coat.

One of my dad's work colleagues came up to him while we headed outside and said "Cute dog. Is it a husky?" A husky? Do I look like husky? I should mention that this highly intelligent person went to Florida State University, where there is no school of veterinary medicine. Don't get mom started on FSU. However, I don't think you need a vet school to see the difference between me and a husky. They pull sleds and I ride in the back of my Doggy Ride bike buggy. They are from Siberia and I am from Scotland.

You would think with Google, people would know these things.

SWIMMING

As a retriever, I think you would be hard pressed to find a better swimming dog. Okay, the Newfoundlands are pretty amazing, but they are the size of a nuclear submarine and have you seen the slobber they leave behind? Have you ever heard anyone call a Newfie the life of the party? Retrievers, and especially Goldens are not only great swimmers, we are pretty much great at everything we do except when it comes to guarding the house.

I stupidly have now managed to fall into my swimming pool four times. I know...not cool. I think my mom was starting to think I wasn't really going to like swimming. Well, last week, the folks and I rode over to the beach and I showed them. I was a swimming fiend. Hello, where's the camera?

Yesterday we went boating. Again, I was pretty amazing in the water. I even stunned myself by jumping off the swim platform into the water. Again, the folks missed this amazing Kodak moment by leaving the camera on the boat. My dad just got an iPhone so you would think he would be better prepared.

BOATING WITH HAWKEYE

A couple posts ago, I mentioned the accomplishments of my sister Bella and brother Jameson. Needless to say, I was feeling a little low since I was pretty much only playing with my toys. Well not anymore. Yesterday, my mom and dad took me out in the boat and learned how to drive it. And yes, I am feeling pretty good about myself. Now if I could just remember my name....

MY NAME

Just like royalty I have a lot of names. My official name is Moonstruck's Hawkeye of Cayo Hueso. Moonstruck is my mom's family name. Hawkeye is after the character in the Last of the Mohicans (and because my folks liked it a lot.I am not named after the character from M.A.S.H) and Cayo Hueso is where I live. I also have my family name which is Hawkeye Orion Beans Belland. They just call me Hawkeye although I hear the word "No" more than my name, so I sometimes think that might be one of my names too.

Orion and Beans were dogs that belonged to my mom and dad and Belland is my new last name. I am told that have really big shoes to fill when it comes to dogs but if you saw my feet, you would see that really won't be a problem.

MY DOG FAMILY

So I thought I would share some family photos with you. This is a great picture of my mom, Madison, my brother Jameson, my sister Bella and me. I call this the Last Supper.

Speaking about my family, I should tell you I come from a long line of champions. My family tree is as big as the British Royal Family, only my relatives are all a lot better to look at. I have been in touch with my brother and sister since we left our old home. My brother Jameson who lives in Orlando is already swimming and my sister Bella, who lives with my mom Madison, started driving. I just get pulled around in bike buggy and chase after a rubber chicken.

COMING TO KEY WEST

The day started out like any other. Got up, played with my sister, Bella and my brother who goes by Grassy Green, because that is the color he likes to wear. Ate a little, stopped at my mom's filling station and loaded up a delicious swig of milk.

Before I know it, I am sitting in the back of a black Ford Expedition (who drives a black car in Florida in the summertime?) and I am heading to Key West. Key West? Hello, I am wearing a little fur coat. How about something with a mild summer, say Maine? Martha Stewart has a swell place up there I could visit. On our way down south we stop at some really hip places, Yehaw Junction, the service plaza at Snapper Creek and some church in Big Pine Key. These folks really know how to show a dog good time.

Anyway, after about 10 hours and in dog years, that seemed like 7 months, we finally get to this Key West place. It doesn't seem too bad, although it is a little warmer than I would like it. I really hope these people have air conditioning because otherwise, I will start Twittering Martha about visiting.

I start to check the place out. Nice yard, brick deck, swimming pool. Damn! In my attempt to show off how I can trot around the pool, I fell in to the darn thing. Thank God for those web feet. They sure do come in handy in times like these. Not that I needed them mind you, because the man who drove me, scooped me up by this silly red harness he put on me. I am not so sure red is my color. I have been wearing hunter green for so long, I've become attached to it. Now these folks have me in red. I just hope the color doesn't run on my coat and I get mistaken for an Irish Setter.